![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
I'm sure by now that most of you are familiar with the RaceFail09 discussions that are still continuing in parts of Live Journal and other websites. I've stayed on the most outer periphery myself, partially because it really upsets me to read nasty, bigoted comments (and there have been an alarming and saddening number of them), and partially because I didn't want to experience the misery of being confronted with my own ignorance.
But I'm only a little bit of a coward, so I've been working on the latter by reading essays written by people of colour (PoCs, as they're being known) about their experiences as consumers of SF/F. (
sparkymonster offers a link to them here, which I in turn got via
friendshipper, thank you.
sheafrotherdon,
rydra_wong both have excellent information and commentary on the subject as well, and there are many, many others.)
It's miserable, heartbreaking stuff. I think the following quote (from
yuki_onna, which I read in
sheafrotherdon's journal) hits the essence:
Stories teach us how to survive. They tell us that our lives can be transcendent, that we can overcome almost anything, no matter how strange, that we can go into the black wood and come out again, that the witch can be burned up in her own oven, that we can find someone who fits a shoe, that the youngest, unloved child will find their way in the world, that those who suffer can become strong, can escape, can find their way into comfort and joy again. . . .
And when we see story after story that has no one like us in it, a book entirely without women, a TV show where white people speak Chinese but there are no Asians visible, a movie set in California without Hispanics, image after image of a world where everyone is straight, and when we are told that it's no big deal, really, there is no race in future societies, that it's not anyone's fault if all the characters are white, that's just how they are, in the pure authorial mind, that we have no sense of humor, that we are ganging up on people because we speak our minds, this is what we hear:
You do not have a right to live. There are no stories for you, to teach you how to survive, because the world would prefer you didn't. You don't get to be human, to understand your suffering or move beyond it. In the perfect future society, you do not exist.
I remember distinctly being a child--I probably wasn't older than five--and noticing that there were two children in my class who had black hair and beautiful dark, dark brown eyes shaped a little like triangles, and that Kahlil Azan (I will never forget that name, Kahlil Azan, I so loved how it sounded) had skin as dark as his eyes and hair. I remember noticing, but not attaching significance to it, the difference between seeing something as interesting or beautiful and seeing something as other. I didn't know how to think of these children as 'other'. They just were, the way I was or my sister was or anyone else.
I don't remember when I learned about otherness, but I do remember one day picking up Telempath by Spider Robinson and being shocked that the main character was black, especially because I knew Spider Robinson was white. I think I was in my early teens, maybe a little younger than that. I was an avid reader of Piers Anthony's Xanth series since the age of twelve, and I had already been so indoctrinated into the world of white privilege that I only became aware of the absence of characters of colour when I suddenly found one.
I was a scared, sad child, surprisingly ignorant considering the education and worldliness of both my parents. I was fourteen before I knew what the word, 'lesbian' meant. I had no idea that two of my drama classmates were gay. There was only one student of colour in my high school drama class; I didn't really think about it.
One time our drama class went on a field trip to the Stratford Festival to see Shakespearian plays performed by some of the finest actors in Canada. That year the featured play was "A Merchant of Venice". Since so much of the play involved anti-Semitism, the director chose to set the play in an era where slavery was also common, to showcase the general bigotry, I believe. There were two black actors in the cast, both playing servants in non-speaking roles. I think one of them moved a chair.
And during the intermission, the only PoC in my drama class turned to me and asked rhetorically, "Is that the only kind of role I'm going to get?" And I didn't know what to answer him, because at least at the time he was right.
I think I really started noticing the absence of PoC in my favourite genres after that, because of him. But it would take more years before I really understood what that actually represented. If you'd asked, I would have said it was just the author's choice, that if you want a truly equal society then individuals should be free to write about whatever characters they choose. I would have said that it didn't really matter because we're all the same, aren't we? I would have said, yeah, it's too bad, but there's no point in worrying about it, because nothing's going to change.
I didn't understand that it's only the privileged group that thinks like this, that it doesn't have to matter to us if PoC are represented or not, because white people are represented all the time. We can smugly talk about equality and authorial right and sigh about how this is just the way things are because we aren't the ones who are absent. In fictional media--I'd hazard that in any media--the default is white. If a person's skin colour isn't described, he (the default is also male after all) will be imagined as white. White, male and straight.
(I actually had a gay friend in high school (he told me, otherwise I would have never known), and I knew there was prejudice against homosexuals, but I don't think I truly understood what that meant either. Not until I became enmeshed in slash fandom, funnily enough. Though it's possible that my memory is failing me again and I'm doing myself a disservice. I hope so.)
I'm sure that this insidious, systemic racism isn't news to any of you, but it was to me. I got that there was a problem of a lack of representation (I wasn't so blind as to not notice that the lead and most of the main characters of every genre show I favoured were white), but I didn't get why it was a problem, not really. I thought it was lamentable and unfair, so I tried to do something about it by populating my novels with as many characters of colour that I could.
So, yes, I knew it was unfair. But I didn't know that it was a negation.
I get that now. I'm thirty-six. This revelation has taken far too long but at least I have it. And I always notice the absences now, and there are so many.
I can only name two television shows off the top of my head where the lead is black: The Unit (which I'm not even sure is still on the air) and CSI, though Lawrence Fishburne is a very recent addition to the cast. Ugly Betty stars an Hispanic, but I can't think of any shows where the leads are Asian, not even on the specialty networks.
It should be obvious that I love sci-fi and fantasy, so the Sci-Fi (soon to be SyFy) channel is of special interest to me. So far, its track record for having CoC (or even female leads) is absolutely appalling. The channel's treatment of homosexuals is even worse.
thingswithwings has several gorgeous and heartbreaking essays about that here. SyFi's two newest series due out this fall have--possibly--two regular cast members of colour between them, out of a cast of at least six for one and (maybe) four for the other (though I think it's just three, all white). I won't even bother with wondering if any of those characters will be gay, because there's no point.
Interestingly, and sadly, when I mentioned out how there were no PoC leads in these shows, my husband told me that yes, he didn't like it either, but there was no point in my getting upset about it. Nothing is going to change.
He's right, of course. Nothing will change so long as no one tries to change it. But I'm wondering, if there were more books out there with CoC who were the leads, if there were more movies and comics and TV shows and video games, wouldn't it change? Right now nearly all the teachers at my son's daycare are either black or Hispanic. Both his babysitters were born in Mexico. This is the real world; this is normal. Why can't our beloved created worlds be normal like that, too?
So. I have decided that I will be the change I want to see in the world. I started with my novel Dauntless, though in retrospect I didn't do enough. I'm continuing by having at least one CoC--one cool, kickass, brave and good CoC--in as many possible stories, vignettes or novels I write from now on.
This isn't going to be easy. One of the essays I read (I've forgotten who wrote it or where it was, unfortunately EDIT: this is the essay, thanks to
hammerxsword) talked about the CoC in Firefly. The same characters I'd seen as a smart, brave and loyal warrior; a gently sardonic, morally steadfast intellectual and an exotic, sophisticated and graceful courtesan, she saw as (to paraphrase): a fanatically loyal, gung-ho grunt who shot first and asked questions later; a foolish, narrow-minded religious cliché; and a whore. It's not just enough that CoC are present, but they have to be presented well. If you almost never see anyone who looks like you, I think it would hurt doubly if the few times you do they're in negative or typical roles.
thingswithwings also writes about this. Antiheroes are another privilege of the already privileged, and I don't want to be part of the problem.
And yes, I have homosexual characters too, in case you're wondering. I will never be able to write something where everyone who might read it will be able to see themselves, but I can try.
I can try. And maybe if enough people try, then one day the way the world will be the way we want it to be.
But I'm only a little bit of a coward, so I've been working on the latter by reading essays written by people of colour (PoCs, as they're being known) about their experiences as consumers of SF/F. (
![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
It's miserable, heartbreaking stuff. I think the following quote (from
![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
Stories teach us how to survive. They tell us that our lives can be transcendent, that we can overcome almost anything, no matter how strange, that we can go into the black wood and come out again, that the witch can be burned up in her own oven, that we can find someone who fits a shoe, that the youngest, unloved child will find their way in the world, that those who suffer can become strong, can escape, can find their way into comfort and joy again. . . .
And when we see story after story that has no one like us in it, a book entirely without women, a TV show where white people speak Chinese but there are no Asians visible, a movie set in California without Hispanics, image after image of a world where everyone is straight, and when we are told that it's no big deal, really, there is no race in future societies, that it's not anyone's fault if all the characters are white, that's just how they are, in the pure authorial mind, that we have no sense of humor, that we are ganging up on people because we speak our minds, this is what we hear:
You do not have a right to live. There are no stories for you, to teach you how to survive, because the world would prefer you didn't. You don't get to be human, to understand your suffering or move beyond it. In the perfect future society, you do not exist.
I remember distinctly being a child--I probably wasn't older than five--and noticing that there were two children in my class who had black hair and beautiful dark, dark brown eyes shaped a little like triangles, and that Kahlil Azan (I will never forget that name, Kahlil Azan, I so loved how it sounded) had skin as dark as his eyes and hair. I remember noticing, but not attaching significance to it, the difference between seeing something as interesting or beautiful and seeing something as other. I didn't know how to think of these children as 'other'. They just were, the way I was or my sister was or anyone else.
I don't remember when I learned about otherness, but I do remember one day picking up Telempath by Spider Robinson and being shocked that the main character was black, especially because I knew Spider Robinson was white. I think I was in my early teens, maybe a little younger than that. I was an avid reader of Piers Anthony's Xanth series since the age of twelve, and I had already been so indoctrinated into the world of white privilege that I only became aware of the absence of characters of colour when I suddenly found one.
I was a scared, sad child, surprisingly ignorant considering the education and worldliness of both my parents. I was fourteen before I knew what the word, 'lesbian' meant. I had no idea that two of my drama classmates were gay. There was only one student of colour in my high school drama class; I didn't really think about it.
One time our drama class went on a field trip to the Stratford Festival to see Shakespearian plays performed by some of the finest actors in Canada. That year the featured play was "A Merchant of Venice". Since so much of the play involved anti-Semitism, the director chose to set the play in an era where slavery was also common, to showcase the general bigotry, I believe. There were two black actors in the cast, both playing servants in non-speaking roles. I think one of them moved a chair.
And during the intermission, the only PoC in my drama class turned to me and asked rhetorically, "Is that the only kind of role I'm going to get?" And I didn't know what to answer him, because at least at the time he was right.
I think I really started noticing the absence of PoC in my favourite genres after that, because of him. But it would take more years before I really understood what that actually represented. If you'd asked, I would have said it was just the author's choice, that if you want a truly equal society then individuals should be free to write about whatever characters they choose. I would have said that it didn't really matter because we're all the same, aren't we? I would have said, yeah, it's too bad, but there's no point in worrying about it, because nothing's going to change.
I didn't understand that it's only the privileged group that thinks like this, that it doesn't have to matter to us if PoC are represented or not, because white people are represented all the time. We can smugly talk about equality and authorial right and sigh about how this is just the way things are because we aren't the ones who are absent. In fictional media--I'd hazard that in any media--the default is white. If a person's skin colour isn't described, he (the default is also male after all) will be imagined as white. White, male and straight.
(I actually had a gay friend in high school (he told me, otherwise I would have never known), and I knew there was prejudice against homosexuals, but I don't think I truly understood what that meant either. Not until I became enmeshed in slash fandom, funnily enough. Though it's possible that my memory is failing me again and I'm doing myself a disservice. I hope so.)
I'm sure that this insidious, systemic racism isn't news to any of you, but it was to me. I got that there was a problem of a lack of representation (I wasn't so blind as to not notice that the lead and most of the main characters of every genre show I favoured were white), but I didn't get why it was a problem, not really. I thought it was lamentable and unfair, so I tried to do something about it by populating my novels with as many characters of colour that I could.
So, yes, I knew it was unfair. But I didn't know that it was a negation.
I get that now. I'm thirty-six. This revelation has taken far too long but at least I have it. And I always notice the absences now, and there are so many.
I can only name two television shows off the top of my head where the lead is black: The Unit (which I'm not even sure is still on the air) and CSI, though Lawrence Fishburne is a very recent addition to the cast. Ugly Betty stars an Hispanic, but I can't think of any shows where the leads are Asian, not even on the specialty networks.
It should be obvious that I love sci-fi and fantasy, so the Sci-Fi (soon to be SyFy) channel is of special interest to me. So far, its track record for having CoC (or even female leads) is absolutely appalling. The channel's treatment of homosexuals is even worse.
![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
Interestingly, and sadly, when I mentioned out how there were no PoC leads in these shows, my husband told me that yes, he didn't like it either, but there was no point in my getting upset about it. Nothing is going to change.
He's right, of course. Nothing will change so long as no one tries to change it. But I'm wondering, if there were more books out there with CoC who were the leads, if there were more movies and comics and TV shows and video games, wouldn't it change? Right now nearly all the teachers at my son's daycare are either black or Hispanic. Both his babysitters were born in Mexico. This is the real world; this is normal. Why can't our beloved created worlds be normal like that, too?
So. I have decided that I will be the change I want to see in the world. I started with my novel Dauntless, though in retrospect I didn't do enough. I'm continuing by having at least one CoC--one cool, kickass, brave and good CoC--in as many possible stories, vignettes or novels I write from now on.
This isn't going to be easy. One of the essays I read (I've forgotten who wrote it or where it was, unfortunately EDIT: this is the essay, thanks to
![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
And yes, I have homosexual characters too, in case you're wondering. I will never be able to write something where everyone who might read it will be able to see themselves, but I can try.
I can try. And maybe if enough people try, then one day the way the world will be the way we want it to be.
Tags:
(no subject)
24/3/09 20:42 (UTC)Thank you for writing about it. I didn't know about these discussions.
(no subject)
24/3/09 20:53 (UTC)Anyway, check this out: http://mail.google.com/mail/?shva=1#inbox/1203a389444cd0e8 I haven't gone through it yet, but I'm sure it'll give me some more perspective.
(no subject)
24/3/09 23:57 (UTC)Any one of those characters could be perceived with a focus on their vices. We could argue that Joss represented Jayne as the typical white body builder who likes women, beating people up, and much hearty grog. We could argue that Simon misrepresents wealthy classes as ignorant and arrogant. These are just characters. I fail to see any racial stereotypes in these characters. They have characteristics. Some are negative. That's what makes an interesting character.
I would be more concerned about sitcoms which aired in the 90s which featured an all-black cast and dialogue which absolutely permeated racial stereotype. The Jamie Foxx Show comes to mind.
I don't mean to dismiss concerns about racial representation in these characters. It's certainly a valid question to ask, but as an individual who doesn't typically judge based on skin tone, I wouldn't say any of these three characters (except maybe Inara) is represented with any more intended negative implication than is any one of your typically human characters in an interesting telly programme.
(no subject)
25/3/09 03:28 (UTC)This has been difficult for me to articulate, so I fear I didn't do it well enough in the post, but I think what I'm trying to say is this:
We as white people have the privilege of seeing a character as a character first, and a representation of a certain group second. This is because we have at least one character who represents us--and by 'us' I mean a white person--all the time. There's no hurt involved with seeing ourselves represented by a self-serving, brutish character like Jayne when we've got the wounded, noble Mal as well, or the sweet, moralistic Simon.
But when you're lucky to see even one main character who looks like you in almost any given media, what kind of character they are means as much as the colour of their skin. And constantly seeing those few characters so often portrayed as the sidekicks, the thugs, the straight men or the whores would hurt that much more.
So that seems to give me less leeway, but I'm willing to see what I can do anyway.
(no subject)
25/3/09 06:33 (UTC)(no subject)
24/3/09 21:48 (UTC)I think your intentions are admirable, but I just want... I don't know... I don't want to sound condescending, so this is more of a plea I suppose. What I want, and what I never see, are real characters like the people in your life you've described. It's one thing being cool and good and brave, but I also want conflicted and doubting and complex. That's so rare in writing generally, let alone ethnic minority characters, but that's my hope.
Good luck with getting your book published, btw. I paged back through your entries and saw the progress you've made - last time we spoke you were still nowhere near finishing it! May I ask if my favourite character is still in it? :)
Moony x
(no subject)
24/3/09 23:02 (UTC)I'm sorry that someone at work abused you like that. I can't imagine how people like that could possible think that was acceptable.
You weren't condescending, and I appreciate your point. Funnily enough, I had just read a post by Avalon's Willow (http://seeking-avalon.blogspot.com/2008/03/racism-101.html) that pointed out that intention isn't the point so much as the effect. So I realize that while my intentions might be the best, well, that's the road to hell, right?
My hope is that I'll be able to have well-rounded characters of colour who are also cool and kickass and good and brave. :) My fear is that I'll end up making the same mistake Joss Whedon did--having characters that are either cool or awful, depending on your point of view. That's a mistake I know I made with "Dauntless", and will try not to make again.
(no subject)
25/3/09 02:27 (UTC)But if you never try, you will never succeed. So it is an annoying difficulty. But I'd say that trying is better than not trying.
(no subject)
25/3/09 03:29 (UTC)(no subject)
25/3/09 18:25 (UTC)Hurrah! I've been looking forward to seeing my name in print since you first mentioned what, three or four years ago? :-o
I'm sorry that someone at work abused you like that. I can't imagine how people like that could possible think that was acceptable.
Yeah, it was this grizzly old lab technician who thought he was making a hilarious joke. He got his, anyway - from me, the deputy head and the head, and he's being shuffled off into retirement at the end of this year. What was really disappointing, though, was the attitude of my head of physics, who told me "that's just the way he is" and to ignore him. I'm still toying with the idea of sending him some links about white priviledge.
So I realize that while my intentions might be the best, well, that's the road to hell, right?
It can be, certainly. So long as you keep thinking about it, and educating yourself, though, I think that's half the battle.
(no subject)
26/3/09 05:27 (UTC)In all honestly though, it's possible that the physics head is right--not that there was no point in him doing anything, or that it was up to you to just ignore it, but that it might be impossible to change the lab tech.
Did you mean send the essay to the physics head, or the lab tech? If it's the former, that's very brave of you, but I'd be concerned that you'd get in trouble for it, subtly or otherwise.
(no subject)
26/3/09 08:29 (UTC)But really, I think the best and only thing to do is make them real. Because when they're real you're going to get exactly that: characters that are both good and bad, characters that speak to some people and maybe not to others. In your example you remarked on how you saw Inara as a "sophisticated and graceful courtesan" and your friend saw her as a "whore." Inara IS both of those things. (Though I think "whore" is a pretty ugly word for what she does, particularly in the framework of her world.) That's part of what makes her a good character. You could characterize the white characters the same way: Mal is a strong, principled and compassionate leader, or he's a washed-up controlling bitter failure; Simon is a gentle and devoted brother or a spoiled little rich boy who hasn't managed to pry out the silver spoon yet. Jayne is a knife-wielding backstabbing psychopath or a.... knife-wielding, backstabbing psychopath. ;D And I'll never believe anybody who tells me Zoe was anything less than 100% awesome. But they're all deeply flawed characters... that's why they're interesting. I think if Whedon had wanted to do himself a favor on the PoC front he'd have a) cast actors of color in an overwhelming majority of background and bit roles, since IMO his worldbuilding actually lends itself to that and b) given more main storylines to his PoC characters in the ensemble. But the CoC he did create were, IMO, great characters. Book, for instance, could've had fantastic stories written about his mysterious past. Given a longer run to the show, I'm sure those stories would've been told. (But that's an epic race fail there too, isn't it? Because CoCs never seem to be the MAIN character, and as such their stories come second -- they have to wait their turn. We could get thirty stories about Mal and his epic manpain before we got a single one about Book or Zoe or even poor underutilized Wash.)
A more genuine criticism, I think, of use of CoCs is Supernatural, where basically any CoC who turns up (pretty much always guest stars, since all leads and most recurrings are white) is going to be either a) evil or b) possessed by evil or c) dead by the end of the season (probably after having turned evil). That is a show that needs a kick in the ass and is blatantly racist in its casting.
For an example on the other side, though, you have a series like Now & Again, where the main lead was white and the secondary was black (the same awesome, awesome actor seen since in 24, The Unit, and a million All State commercials). The black character was to a certain extent plainly the villain, sort of the Dr. Frankenstein of the piece, and essentially stood like a brick wall between our hero and his happiness. But at the same time, that CoC was deeply lovable and understandable, and it was hard to see him as a "bad guy," even if logically he should've been painted as such. I dunno, somebody will probably come tell me that that was the worst CoC ever and totally insulting to the world at large, but I loved him.
Anyway, my point is, whether you write characters of color is secondary to whether you write them well. (I'd kind of rather never seen another CoC on Supernatural than have to watch them butcher a few more, frankly.) That doesn't mean they're always good people or strong people or morally upright people... just people. If they happen to be all that, awesome. If they happen to be all that and a bag of complexity, even better. Every character doesn't have to be a positive role model, though especially for an underrepresented group, it's always nice if they are. They just need to be genuine. IMO.
(no subject)
28/3/09 02:23 (UTC)(no subject)
25/3/09 02:29 (UTC)I only caught a moment of the BSG finale -- I think I got out of bed to get a glass of water? -- what I remember (with the bit of my brain that hadn't turned into cotton batting) was that there were lots of couples kissing. My first thought was, 'Oh, BSG'. My second though followed along after a bit and made me sad: 'Dammit, all straight couples. No surprise there.' My third thought was the slightly confused 'this is clearly not all in normal reality?' And my fourth thought made me angry again: 'And all white, too. Surprise, surprise'. So now you have my complete reaction to the BSG finale.
I am not sure if you have seen this already, but on the topic of Hollywood's whitewashing of shows-- the four leads for the movie of Avatar: the Last Airbender are all white despite none of them being white in the original (animated) TV show. (For more details, the journal
(no subject)
25/3/09 03:37 (UTC)I know about the Last Airbender, yeah. And I'll admit I was willing to overlook it because I've never watched the show. But I've been trying to put myself in the place of a PoC who's about to lose a favourite show to unnecessary Whitewashing, and I'm going to write a letter.
(no subject)
25/3/09 04:11 (UTC)I'm not going to buy the DVD for Javier, that's for sure. If he's interested when he gets older, he can watch the original cartoon.
(no subject)
25/3/09 03:03 (UTC)The one thing that those of us who are in the majority must be vigilant about is making sure that the characters of other races and ethnicities are represented in a way that addresses the complexities that go along with being other. Sometimes what happens is that, for instance, the skin color is changed, but the struggles of being 'other' are left by the wayside. We end up with white characters who happen to have the physical features of another race. Or we end up with token characters that somehow attempt to represent the group. I see both of these often. We must ask and research how members of other races, ethnicities, and sexual orientations wish to be represented.
It is a valiant endeavor, one that I think can and should be undertaken. It makes me happy to see that someone like you, who is so good at representing the tiny, almost imperceptible nuances of character would want to do this. I know you will do it well.
(no subject)
25/3/09 03:48 (UTC)I do want to do this well. I'll say that one of the benefits of writing science fiction that takes place hundreds of years from now is that it's okay to not mention the struggles of the real world. That said, I still need to be careful. I don't want to replace absence with stereotype.
I'll also admit that the idea of writing a longer piece about the werewolves with Jeb as a main character scares me. I don't want to make him typical, or too special, or a victim. I really don't want to get him wrong. At the moment I'm feeling hampered by not really knowing what not to do. I'm hoping that some of the essays I've found can help me figure it out.
I'll try, for sure. I hope I can live up to your expectation. :)
(no subject)
25/3/09 06:58 (UTC)(no subject)
25/3/09 18:22 (UTC)Your icon is really cute!
(no subject)
25/3/09 09:35 (UTC)(no subject)
25/3/09 18:24 (UTC)I haven't watched Dexter, but thank you for telling me about it.
here from rydra_wong's links
26/3/09 19:11 (UTC)And, if you're intersted, the blog post on Firefly is this entry by Pam Noles following up her essay on Earthsea and race (http://andweshallmarch.typepad.com/and_we_shall_march/2006/01/the_shame_of_ea.html). I remember it well for having very much the same reaction as you did.
Re: here from rydra_wong's links
28/3/09 02:24 (UTC)Thank you as well for your comment, and I really appreciate the link. I've added it to the post. :D