Yeah, that flavor of dissonance is a real bitch! ;-) I think I wrote a post about it one time for the year I did LJ Idol. Walking around in Northampton - funky college town in Massachusetts, all full of interesting little shops, street musicians, people walking around just doing their thing. I was enjoying it immensely . . . until I caught a reflection of myself in a window. WTF? Totally jarring - my outside and my inside were miles apart! DISLIKE!!

And I often (almost always!) feel like I'm faking it to a degree. I think I'm just better at it than I used to be, and people buy it a lot. Slogan for our karate instructor's training: Fake it till you make it! Life motto, more like :-)

So you're not alone. At the very least, I'm there too. And I'm positive there's so many others out there, it's just whether or not they reveal it ;-)

*hugs*