1) They can, though from the article, it seems like you kind of have to work at it. And hey, just don't use bicarbonate of soda as an antacid and you'll be fine. And don't watch the movie Seven. Seriously. Seriously. Don't.

2) Cooking is actually really fun, I swear! And it's honestly almost impossible to kill (or even maim) anyone with standard ingredients, I promise!